How Psychosis Takes Over Your Mind



 
I remember this scenario very clearly. I was sat at my desk, close to midnight, rational and well. Suddenly a wave came over my body, like an energy wave. I experienced the physical sensation, then almost immediately had the thought "I'm Jesus". It was very powerful, and terrifying. My first thought was: "Oh no, this process comes with so much energy, I won't sleep tonight, and I'm taking my son to school tomorrow morning. I don't want this energy, I don't want this illness."

So straight away I phoned my friend. I am very fortunate and blessed that she answered the phone so late. I told her everything. I didn't need to be embarrassed because we had already talked about the fact the psychosis makes me think that I'm Jesus.
"It's happening again. I was just sat at my desk and the wave of psychosis came over my body, instantly making me think that I'm Jesus."

"James don't worry. You know that it is not you. Don't listen to it, don't give it your attention. Keep on with the things that help you relax. Light some candles, burn some incense, read some scripture, meditate, run a bath. Calm your mind down and get some sleep."

I did exactly what my friend suggested (except for the bath) and to my amazement I fell asleep quite early and managed to take my son to school the next morning.
James 1 Psychosis 0
Many thanks to my friend!

Another way the psychosis can get in is through music. I will be listening to some music, then suddenly there will be a direct message for me: "you're Jesus," "you're the leader," "you're the emperor". It sounds very convincing and goes in deep - as I hear it at that moment I believe it, but in the following moment my rational mind kicks in, all the work I have done in mental health, all the vows I have made to family and friends, the memory of how tragic the psychosis is, and how bitterly it ends; and I manage to strengthen my righteous thoughts, and I dispel it, I eliminate it, I scourge it from my mind and consciousness.
Then I settle down!
James 2 Psychosis 0


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